The Gram Relay

Passing the Baton

So I'm not COMPLETELY without responsibility today. Just got the call from the folks lettin me know they're headed to Jeff City (Misery's entirely unexciting capital, but they have a few shops we don't have around here... yet) and I have the Gram watch. Which just means I need to be available for her to contact if she needs something. We try to make sure one of us is in town at any given time.

Course, odds are favorable that she won't need anything... but it's not like she hasn't had an emergency situation before. Just since she's been HERE, she's already had one stroke and was rushed to the hospital.

Bringing Gram Closer

We (Mom, Pop and I) moved Gram from Kansas to be closer to us here in Misery about two years ago. Since Grandpa died about 15 years ago, she'd been havin a harder and harder time keepin up their house all by herself. And after she spent hours on the floor of her shower with a broken hip after slipping and falling and no way to call for help, we really upped the pressure trying to convince her to move closer to us. (And insistuted a LOT of safety precautions. The woman's bathroom is positively bristling with bars, seats, and various and sundry aides.) However, she doesn't do change well. She'd lived in Kansas almost her whole life... and those of her friends still alive are there. And grandpa's family. We're pretty much the only of her own family left.

A True Lady

But she finally decided to move, and we've enjoyed her company ever since. She and I can sit and talk for hours... she loves to reminesce about the past, and she's lived through a LOT of history. Life is very simple for her in some ways... very black and white... right and wrong. Her trust and belief in her Christian faith is quiet but strong. She doesn't question it, but neither does she preach about it... and it's gotten her through a lot of hard times. Sometimes I envy her for that singularity of belief. She's the sweetest lady I know... though, she fusses about EVERYTHING. She will bend over backwards to try not to impose on you. Which was part of her reluctance to move.

She's also a very private person... doesn't get out much, and takes a while to make new friends. Hmm... much like myself, actually. I don't think she's felt quite settled here. Doesn't help that her life was doubly disrupted by yet another surgery almost as soon as she got here: hip-replacement. That poor woman has more things wrong with her body. I don't think she's really ever without some sort of discomfort or pain.

She still has her independence (such as it is) and her own apartment. But still needs a bit of help here and there. Which is where my relatively new responsibilities come in.

*** to be continued after my phone call :) ***

New Responsibilities

Okee... responsibilities. I've never really had much responsibility for another human being. Well, aside from the pilots of the Cobras (helicopters) I maintained in the Navy. But that was work. At home, I take care of my plants and my cat and me. When Gram moved out here, I learned what it's like to have somebody else depend on me for their life to function normally. And I discovered that it's not that much of an inconvenience when it's somebody you genuinely care about and enjoy being around. I think her being here has been good all round.

Responsibilities in the Future

Of course, my life rarely stays the same (does any?) and sometimes I'm concerned how this responsibility will be affected. I'm not the only one she leans on for help, but I also don't want my actions to create a burden to my folks. I know I won't be in Misery for much longer. Of course, not to be morbid, but neither will Gram. And Mom and Pop have been discussing moving, themselves. Misery is hometown to none of us, and I don't think any of us have ever felt completely at home here. We're not entirely sure where we want to go, but it's not here. I suppose we'll simply see how it goes when the time comes.

Okee... enough rambling about Gram. Need to go veg on the couch or somethin.