Hangin up the Hat

So my brain has officially hung up it's hat for the day. And I still have an hour and 45 minutes left before quittin time. *sigh*

Hectic day. Had to power through an advertisement (4 pages of steps for those suckers) at the last minute cuz the PM (Project Manager) didn't know if he had authorization to proceed with the project until this morning, and it advertises on Monday, and the ad had to get to the papers by the end of today. That was this morning. It actually wasn't that difficult... I've done enough advertisements now that the process is pretty streamlined. It's just all the friggin interruptions that got me frustrated. And I normally don't mind interruptions at all... just not when I'm on a deadline, here.

Of course, I strongly suspect PMS is contributing to my overall irritability. Most things I normally roll with are seriously getting on my nerves this week.

Amway, add onto that our temp, who's a very nice girl, but hasn't really been focusing on her work. Granted, she's having a complicated pregnancy and has a lot on her mind, but she's not helping me much, here. Everything I give her, she's working by rote... not really paying attention to what she's doing, so I end up catching a lot of obvious errors. Now, I'm not sure how much of that can be attributed to being a million miles away upstairs, how much to simple inexperience, and how much to a crappy teacher (me), but either way, I'd get much more accomplished if I just did the work myself in the first place. But we have to keep her busy.

So that has contribued to my irritability, as well.

Then, this afternoon I was treated to a self-taught crash course on hooking up the laptop and projector, and using a jump drive. Our old Office Manager was the one that worked with all that equipment. None of us had done it before, the Office Whisperer was swamped getting the presentation ready, the Receptionist is completely lost when it comes to this stuff, so it was up to me to figure it out.

I had to wheedle a half hour out of the folks who had a meeting in that conference room right up to the time of the presentation. The set-up actually went fairly well, but the jump drive and I had to come to terms a time or two. It wasn't saving the correct file. It faked me out into believing I'd successfully saved over another file of the same name (last year's presentation). I didn't learn the error of it's ways until I finally managed to download the file onto the laptop, brought it up, toggled the display... and my boss (yes, my boss was giving this presentation) immediately pointed out the obvious fact that the date is 2 years old. This was while we were surrounded by the rest of the big-wigs he was presenting to, cuz the powerpoint file was so damned big that it took 5 years to upload then download, and I was late getting started, and the meeting was already 10 minutes underway.

So I ran with the jump drive back to my desk (on the other side of the building), resaved the file (another 5 years), ran back to the conference room (boss had already started the presentation using his little powerpoint print-out), downloaded to the laptop again (another 5 years) and finally slunk out of the room.

On the upside, my brain has successfully handled everything thrown at it today. On the downside, my brain has endured waaaaaaayyyy too much pressure today. I get the impression I'd never hack it in the corporate world. lol

Amway, time to go pack up all that equipment again. BUT! I now only have an hour left before I can go home. :)

Pep Talks for the Clinically Insane

Insanity

So my newest ex-friend has completely blocked me from MySpace. At least I assume that's why my Inbox is curiously empty of all of our interaction, while everybody else's is still there. Somehow, I find this funny. I'm sure the dood is convinced I'm one of those certified internet wack-jobs, and he' d best protect himself from me. Odd, since my probably ill-advised blunt-fest was essentially telling him to back off. With a little bit of not-so-necessary embellishment. Regardless, hermits are hardly prone to stalking.

But it makes one think: do certified internet wack-jobs really think they're wack-jobs? What's the difference between wack-jobs and regular peeps with odd circumstances? And how do you know you're not one of 'em? Radish was giving me a pep talk the other day... I was freaking out a bit at 1) being so rood to Evil Twin (I hate being rood to anybody) and 2) how negatively I reacted to a little bit of flirting. I mean, I've obviously not developed as healthy an outlook as I thought I had. But that's a whole nother issue. Something about iron grips and suffocating or some such.

But I had to wonder later: do the clinically insane get pep talks from their friends, too?

Normal

Ah well... back to normal life. It's actually resuming at a very convenient time. I've needed all my focus for work. This week has been busy, busy, busy. The Office Manager left us a few weeks ago, and the Office Whisperer has been out this week for conferences and to prepare for her daughter's wedding. The receptionist and I have had help from a temp, and said temp has been extremely helpful, but I've had to spend as much time showing her how to do stuff as I have getting my own work done.

But... it's Friday, Office Whisperer is back next week (as the new Office Manager), and we will already be getting our newest support staff addition in a couple of weeks. It'll be hectic for a while, but I'm confident all will work itself out soon. :)

And I have to find out what Pop wants for his Father's day dinner this weekend.

Questions

How is it that I can exercise great tact… feel practically compelled to do so, for 90% of my life… but feel compelled to equally great bluntness (to the point of rudeness) when 1) hormonal, 2) not feeling well, or 3) threatened? When the hell did I reach the point of feeling threatened over simple flirting? Why can’t I keep my mouth shut until AFTER I reason myself out of a panic... and, yes, dire need to commit sabotage? How am I able to logically understand and dissect this psychological morass of a vicious circle when it comes to physical relationships, but have absolutely no clue how to break it?

Why do some people go on about one’s “refreshing” candor, claim they have the intestinal fortitude and thickness of skin to not be shocked by much, yet run screaming when that candor takes on a sharp edge? Is it the content of what I have to say that is so objectionable, or my delivery? Is it unrealistic to think somebody could handle my bluntness… throw it right back at me, even? Is it unrealistic to think that anybody would even want to? Will I ever get to know somebody long enough for them to understand what’s behind the blunt… BEFORE I bonk them over the head with it? How much is too much or too soon to warn somebody about certain panic triggers?

Fuck it… I knew there was a reason I liked being a hermit. Good news is: I have plenty of time to blog again. lol

Today's Chickweed

I rather like today's 9 Chickweed Lane. Of course, Thorax is a hoot any day of the year, but he has some particularly interesting thoughts this week.

It's a little small to read, so here's today's Meditation of Thorax:

"People of religious distinction maintain that human beings, exclusive of all other creatures, possess souls and are, therefore, entitled to admittance into heaven. Human beings alone lie, libel, slander, devise progroms, murder for recreation and perform crossword puzzles. This says nothing new about the human condition, but it illuminates what a sould contributes to it.

It also clarifies the entrance requirements for heaven."

Backlog

So, yeah... it's been a while since I've shown my face here in blog-world. But I have a good reason for it... I think I've mentioned in past that I can only focus on one writing endeavor at a time. And I've had quite an interesting past week.

Just about as long as I've been involved in the fascinating world of the internet, my mascot has been a li'l treefrog. Most of my online friends are aware of this. Well, I discovered a week ago that I'm not the only one so enamored of the green li'l doods. A rather intriguing guy on MySpace discovered the same commonality and just had to pop in to comment on the observation. And we've been sharing very interesting e-mails back and forth ever since.

I'm not quite gettin excited about this guy yet, but I'm having a lot of fun so far, and there are definately possibilities for further development. And he's even earned himself a blog-name: my Evil Twin. lol This has been a recurring theme in our communication.

Amway, I HAVE had quite a bit to mention here... including the Office Manager's last week a few weeks ago. And Pop's new job at a new hospital. And the Staff Advisory Council Fashion Show I got roped into creating programs and appreciation certificates for. And thoughts on my birthday and getting older. And the horrid bug that decided to buzz directly into my ear at 2:30 in the morning the other night. I'm tellin ya, there's a prominent list of occurences that can cause adrenaline to course through your veins in 1.2 seconds... and that is one of them. I couldn't get back to sleep for hours.

But mostly I wanted to say thank you to one of my faithful readers... a cousin in Kansas who has always encouraged my writing, and happens to be a writer herself. Amway, after I mentioned my birthday a few weeks ago, I suddenly received a surprise birthday card in the mail! It was so unexpected, but very sweet, and I thank you very much. I know you're so good at that sort of thing... and I also know Gram appreciates your remembering her more than words can say. I'm not so good at the thank-you card thing... and I'm increasingly getting worse at the letter-writing thing. So I hope that a thank-you here is sufficient to express my thoughts. :) I really need to get your e-mail addy.

Welp, that's about all I have for now. I just don't have the mental umph to address all the other stuff right now. Who knows how long I'll be focused on writing back and forth to my Evil Twin. Perhaps our communication may progress to another format soon and I can get back into the mood to blog again. We have somewhat of a date to IM this weekend, so that may help. :)